Created By
www.stephengraphics.com
Terms Of Use Statement Privacy Policy Purchase Agreement
DISCLAIMER: The information on this site is for educational purposes only and is
not intended to act as a substitute for medical advice provided by a qualified health
care provider, nor is any information on this site intended to diagnose, treat, cure
or prevent any disease.
FTC Disclosure: If you decide to purchase any products recommended
on this site I may possibly receive some commission.
If anyone has a specific health issue they should always
seek medical advice.
Please note this site may not display properly in the AOL browser
Autism -
Jean Shaw© -
....................................................
If you've read my previous articles you will know the other day on breakfast television,
autism was described as a "living nightmare". That really made my day as my son is
autistic.
Certainly autism is a lifelong disability and for parents it's a real worry.
My son is eighteen and autistic. He bears no resemblance now to the "child from hell"
whom I wrote about in my first book.
I make that statement just incase anyone reading
this has just had their child diagnosed with autism and is filled with despair. Take
it from someone who's been there, done that and got the tee-
However, the problems don't go away. They just change.
Whilst I am no expert, my
best advice would be to accept the autism diagnosis and do whatever you can, as quickly
as you can to help your child be the best he or she can be.
The real "experts" and
just about everyone involved with autism all agree the earlier the intervention,
the better.
Still, the reality is autism is a lifelong disability and whilst your
child can, and most probably will improve in many areas, he or she will always be
vulnerable and most likely need some sort of support. It's a worry.
My son will soon have to leave the security blanket afforded by the children's service
and enter the world of the "adults". Unfortunately the help provided there is sparse
and frequently inappropriate. Often it is centred on what the person can't do rather
than what he or she can.
As I said my son has improved tremendously and with the
right support is capable of all sorts of things.
He seldom speaks and academically
is a very young child but when it comes to routine household and domestic chores
I have more confidence in him than in my "normal" son who is almost two years older.
(Sorry son, but you know it's true).
I have no qualms about him cooking, ironing,
cleaning, decorating, gardening or any such tasks provided he is supervised. He is
careful with tools and is very tidy, is observant, has an eye for detail and a great
memory.
Most autistic individuals like routine so if you show them how to do something
properly from the start then they are likely to do it that way forever.
You just
have to make sure they don't get too rigid about routines. If I explain things to
my son he's now happy to accept and make changes. It wasn't always so but the current
happy state of affairs has evolved over the years.
It just takes endless patience
and persistence.
However, there's one area I can't explain to him and that is emotions
and empathy for other people. He is much better than he used to be but I'm sure he'll
never understand the concept of love and that's a concern for me at the moment.
Why?
Well, it's really to do with a teenage girl he regularly comes into contact with.
I think she has Asperger's Syndrome, or at least she is on the autistic spectrum
somewhere and her hormones have kicked into overdrive.
She is sociable to say the
least.
Having kissed most of the boys in the school and scared half of them (and
their parents) by declaring she wants to have their babies, she now appears to have
set her sights on my son.
Maybe she sees him as a challenge because he is so totally
disinterested. That's the major difference between Asperger's and Autism. One desperately
wants to fit in and be liked whilst the other doesn't care.
Anyway, they were apparently
seen having a full kiss the other evening at the youth club and when questioned,
this young temptress smiled and with a twinkle in her eye declared that since my
son doesn't speak it was just his way of saying "Hello".
However, he doesn't greet
anyone else in that manner so I suspect the lip lock wasn't instigated by my son.
It worries me.
You see whilst he doesn't express emotions he does have feelings. His brain may not
function correctly but the rest of him certainly does. Since that kiss I've begun
to wonder what will happen if he should decide he likes the feeling he gets when
he kisses (or is kissed by) a girl.
My son learns by example and is vulnerable. Hopefully
he'll never be left alone with a member of the opposite sex because although at the
moment he prefers to watch Thomas the Tank Engine and Disney videos to Desperate
Housewives, it could just be a matter of time before he is exposed to such programmes
and what these days his more liberated peers consider "normal".
Remember he learns
by example.
It would only take a few minutes with a learning disabled hormonal Lolita
with little or no understanding of the consequences of unprotected sex and my son
could find himself a father.
He wouldn't even know how or why.
Autism is a lifelong disability and I wouldn't
wish it on anyone. It may or may not be a "living nightmare" but it certainly is
a worry.
