Anyone going through the menopause will recognise these symptoms.

THE MENOPAUSE

I’m going through the menopause
And the symptoms are no fun
I wouldn’t wish a night sweat
Or hot flush on anyone

Oh and don’t forget the mood swings
Weight gain, dry itchy skin,
Thinning hair, expanding waist
Was I ever really thin?

I’m pretty low on self-esteem
Facial hair has seen to that
My memory’s fogged, can’t concentrate
Labido’s almost flat

I know it’s just the hormones
Stage of life I’m going through
But I think I need menopause relief
There are things that I could do

For starters there is HRT
So many types around
Patches, Pills, Gels and Creams
One to suit me could be found

But what about health warnings?
Breast cancer springs to mind
Perhaps I’ll go the alternative route
Natural HRT I‘ll find

Seems exercise, herbs and diet
Can all help in their way
Certain supplements of vitamins
Should be taken every day

Soya foods I’m told are really good
As are Cranberries, Yam, Dong Quai
And Black Cohosh’s recommended
To make hot flashes go away

They suggest you cut out caffein
Which is a blow to me
Water’s good and I like it fine
But it’s not the same as tea

It really is depressing
And I feel too tired to plan
If I come back in another life
I think I’ll be a man!

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